$1.27!? That’s your current net worth!? Are you freaking kidding me?
Oh, and let me guess. You’re going to pull a Big Lebowski and pay for a quart of half-and-half with your debit card, right? Well, the joke’s on you sucker… I’m gonna stick you with a 50-cent surcharge that will leave you with eight cents to your name. How do you feel about that!?